A Day with Chris

Yeah, sometimes things just don’t seem exciting to do. I’m sorry for this really lame picture… I was craving ice cream, and that’s all that I took a picture of. I was really unmotivated to take a picture. Just like I was too tired to think of a title.

But yeah, today was a very good day of fellowship and sharing the gospel with a guy. I skipped my first class too!

I guess to go in more detail, about the evangelizing, it was just amazing to see God bring us to someone who had a softened soil who seemed interested in the gospel and though he didn’t believe now, we know that there are a lot of people continuing to minister to him. I don’t know why this was such a great experience, I’ve had people who were more interested in the gospel, but I guess it’s because when I told him about the gospel of grace, and how we don’t love God for our benefit, but because God loved us first, he thought it was interesting and that no one has said that to him before. But at the same time, it makes me sad that no one has said that to him before either. It kind of gave me mixed feelings.

For the rest of the day though, I was kind of thinking about a verse in my devotionals today.

• But the more they were oppressed, the more they multiplied and the more they spread abroad. And the Egyptians were ind read of the people of Israel.Exodus 1:12

Thinking about God’s faithfulness, I realized so much more about how the grace of God is surely not something I have done to earn. God loved me and made my life great before I was even born. My parents struggled, they had a hard life, yet they knew God would provide for them. Even through bankruptcy. My parents never once thought that it wasn’t going to work out. They tell me to not worry about money, but worry about the people I meet and my relationship with them. They know ultimately that the kingdom is way more important.

But at the same time, I think I don’t have that faith right now to believe that God will do that in my life. I worry too much about everything. And I don’t even feel like doing much. So I took the time to spend time with my roommates instead of AACF people for once. I just wanted to grow in my relationship with them again. It was nice to play basketball and just hang out.

I guess I just don’t know anything else worth doing except to evangelize now. I know I’m not the perfect person, but I feel like if I’m not sharing the gospel or encouraging someone towards it, I don’t feel very comfortable.

Sometimes I think too hard about random stuff like this.

What a day. Starting for morning prayer and just being Grace and me, I was a little discouraged because so many people showed interest in the morning prayers, but at the end of the day, I still think it doesn’t matter about the numbers but about what we prayed for. But it’s not because we prayed, but because God is faithful and when we pray in accordance to his will, he is pleased, not because of us, but because of the glory he deserves. But I honestly didn’t think that way at the time, I was really discouraged to be honest. This is how my day started at 7am.

Then I went through class, and man it was just excruciating to have to deal with class today, especially since I felt so unproductive and very much like I was wasting time in class. I guess in a way, this quarter is really easy.

But after class, I had so many things to do, it kind of just came and went then I realized it was time for the Chick-fil-a fundraiser, and it was fun to just hang out with people and chill there. But I think I was searching for something more, I didn’t really feel like I was doing anything either.

Then it was AACF. And man the message that God spoke through Pastor Moses was crazy. Yet it was a simple message. It was the message of the gospel. A true gospel. This is the gospel; Salvation=The Faith in the Gospel of Grace! This means that we did nothing in our salvation. God loved us, we rejected him. He sent Jesus, we crucified him. Jesus was born again, we didn’t believe him. You see, the gospel is the fact that Jesus did everything for us and all we have to do is believe that he did it for us. It’s that simple acknowledgement that saves us because Jesus did everything else for us and that is true grace. People say that this gospel is too simple, it’s too easy, well yes, that’s why it is grace! Grace, God did it for his glory. Trust me, he didn’t save you so that you can be awesome and the best, he saved you so that you can glorify God and be a reflection of God’s glory.

When I look at my body of work, I realize how it’s so nothing. I need God.

I don’t know, I’m just going to spend time with God, if you guys need to hear the gospel, feel free to message me.

Found this thing at the Arts building at UCR. What a great reminder to just smile and have a great day. I seriously was having a long day.

I had my first interview today, and gosh, I feel so intimidated. I thought I was signing up to TA, but man I guess I’m doing my own curriculum and it’s a bit overwhelming to think that I may have to teach these High School students. I barely know what I learn! Man God help me, if this is actually where you want me to be.

Then I finally met with Lauren! Long time coming, jeeze. But yes it was nice to just chat with someone who isn’t constantly in my life and to just hang out and relax sort of! It was just cool to talk with someone who isn’t in AACF and all that stuff, I don’t know, I like listening to other world talk! HAHA.

Then to complete my day of failing my diet, I went to Olive Garden with Jon, and man it was just nice to talk with someone who connects with me and understands me in so many different levels. I’m so blessed to have this brother and I missed all our daily talks. When did life get so busy that we couldn’t make time for each other. But now we have, and it feels good to be reconnected with a brother!

Then it was Inreach, and gosh I have to tell you, there are still so many things to do. I don’t know how things are going to get done, but I know that I will have faith in God that everything will happen for his glory! But I honestly can’t remember a day where I just wanted to sit back and not do anything. It’s honestly a great difficult struggle! I’m not lying to anyone, this blog is about being honest, and I have to tell you that as a human being it really is discouraging and deadening to have to do all these things.

But when I remember what Christ did for me on that cross, to die for my sin, this doesn’t even compare. For whatever we did wrong, and whatever we deserved to be punished, Jesus bore all of it for us. So I have to remember to find joy in my sufferings. For I suffer for the glory of God!

• Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise.James 5:13

Seriously, no matter if we are suffering or cheerful, the response to each situation is the same. To seek God and to turn to him and give him everything!!! We pray to God, and we praise God. No matter what. So I will continue to smile! God is good! All the time. God is good!

Seriously, why is it so hard to wake up nowadays. I love the morning! My body just doesn’t want to spend it awake anymore I guess. But even like 3 or 4 alarms aren’t enough now. I need to change up my songs or something.

But none the less, having 9am classes aren’t too bad. But today was a special day. We were going to screen our experimental shots and man, I was kind of nervous. I guess I was nervous because I didn’t really like the whole thing as much as I liked. But man, when my professor kind of just told me how much she liked it, I think I was humbled. I don’t know, thank you God for all the opportunities to learn? I don’t know, I don’t think it was anything amazing. But man, hopefully I can really use this gift to bring praise to God.

Then I came home to be productive, but I wasn’t productive at all! Instead I just kind of sat here doing absolutely nothing. Then I went to homeless ministry, and again I was reminded how I’ve been so blessed and that truly the things I have are for other people. You know it was so easy to say how much better off I am than these people, but I think in reality, I’m not because everyday I’m distracted from God while these people have an opportunity to reflect upon God all their life.

Then, I went to go play tennis with my roommates, and I remembered how I loved this sport. Even if I’m not good at it, just the patience and level headedness that is required to play makes me realize just how exactly I am not like that. Train my body, train my mind, train my soul. Jeeze, I still have so much to work on. But God is good. Because I see the fact that he still has great plans for me ultimately to bring glory to God.

Sigh, this quarter is going by so fast. And I still need to do so much.

I know I don’t have any of the Energizer batteries, I personally like Duracell better, but man it’s crazy how there are so many different types of batteries. It’s also amazing how just plugging it in to a wall, or changing the battery can make it recharge.

Man today, I failed so bad. I slept in for church. Not only that, but I was supposed to help serve today. I just didn’t wake up for whatever reason. I set an alarm, etc etc. I just totally failed to wake up. I never realized how tired I was. I guess this year and such took a toll on me.

But I really have no excuses. I think my own conviction is that I haven’t been spending time with God lately. I think I got caught up again with working and doing work and preparing for ministry, I forgot to get my time with God. I know I didn’t even read for my own growth for such a long time. I just did it to prepare for things.

I just hit a speed bump, and I know it. I tripped up on myself and my own lack of self discipline. I have no excuses really. But an honest truth that I am quite a sinner.

But I realize I must fight on, and that I have to keep strong to the faith. I realized how weak I am during this time and how when I don’t spend time with God, that’s when I struggle the most. Even this blog has become so weak lately. And I find myself constantly doing it a few hours into the next day instead of the actual day. I need more discipline and I need to take away from my self.

Gosh, pray for me please.

I love waking up at home. The best part is just seeing my parents in the morning. Even if my mom wasn’t doing too well, it was awesome to be with them. After cooking breakfast and such, I watched Bruce Lee’s The Way of the Dragon with my mom. Although she was going in and out of sleep, it was still awesome to be watching a movie with my mom.

Then I went off to work and man, it made me tired. I didn’t do much today. I spent some time doing homework before work, just hanging out with my parents, and playing with Teddy.

I can see this becoming my daily life after I graduate. I’m going to have to find something interesting to do everyday! I took a picture of my cup because it’s one of my favorite things that I bought this year. And Wolverine reminded me of Bruce Lee.

Er… Chuck Norris. IDK. I’m so random. This weekend went by so fast, I don’t know if I’m ready for next week!

Man, I can say that today was a very eventful day. I think spending a cold windy day inside with my roommates was exciting. Just hanging out and chilling, wrestling, watching them play games. Just what I imagine Fridays to be like in a near dang awesome world. Then it started raining hard. I mean they were fat raindrops… lol. And the weather was so crazy.

But getting to hangout with a brother on Friday and just chill and hang out was awesome. I realize how much I love the one on one time with people. It means a lot when I have an opportunity to meet someone and see how they are doing. I feel blessed to know that people want to meet with me also. I think I enjoy just lounging around and having small talk. I seriously do.

Then it was off to Garden Grove to help out at Yellow’s church. Man I got to say, I was humbled by the chance to share a message and a lil bit of my testimony. I don’t even completely remember what I said, I just remember going on and on about some stuff. The message was from Matthew 5:1-12. Just reminding everyone about how everything is from God first. But I think I was also touched by the youth group as they showed so much enthusiasm in praising God. I was really in awe that these kids poured out their hearts in worship. I can only hope that they continue to grow in God and learn to submit themselves to him.

Then I came home. And my mom having had a successful surgery was resting. Thank God though!!! But my mom being the woman that she is, the first thing she asked me is if my message went well. Dumb mom, always worried about me when she’s the one that can barely get up. But that’s just like my mom. She encouraged me to speak instead of going to the hospital to see her. She makes sure I was eating right before throwing up her food because of the surgeries. But thank God she is doing fine and will make a good recovery, I know God is watching over her. It’s crazy how she says that God prepared her for this. A few years ago, she went to see a doctor who told her that she needed to get more exercise, and as she got healthier, she was told to get a physical, and when she did they found some problems, and so when they found these problems, they were able to act on them quickly before they became even worse. What’s more is that because my mom started exercising, she said that she doesn’t feel as bad as when she had surgery a few years ago. So crazy how God helped her prepare for this.

So yeah, please pray for my mom’s recovery. And please continue to pray for Grace’s church as well as for the AACF people who came to support. God is taking care of anything and regardless of what happens in this life, we know we have eternity with God. PTL!

The Human capacity to learn so many different signs and follow them without thinking about it anymore. Even in this one picture, I know that I can’t walk across this street, can’t turn right, but if I’m in a car I can go straight and that I have to stop ahead, I know the price of cars, and I know that there are cars making a one way right turn, etc.

We’re trained to do so many different things. Humans have an instant reaction to anything around us. It’s crazy how we obey these things too. I mean I know that they are good for us, and they help us survive, but sometimes I think this just makes us into robots. If you think about in Germany there is a highway with no speed limit, and yet it has one of the fewest death rates in the world. I think humans have the capacity to survive without people telling us how to survive.

So yeah, I’ll admit it, I went to Morongo today with my roommates because they always wanted me to go with them. I didn’t go looking to earn money, I went and treated it as if I went to an amusement park. Think about it, when we go to the amusement park, we spend money just to sit on a ride and then have like 15 seconds of adrenaline, or to see Mickey, or Batman. I honestly believe it all comes down to the heart of why we go.

I know I’m not supposed to gamble my money away, but to me I wasn’t trying to make any money from it, or anything, I just spent time with my roommates chilling and talking with them. Yeah so we lost a bit of money, but when you go watch a sports game, you lose money buying a ticket which ultimately does nothing better for you either.

Now I want to say it clearly, I AM NOT TRYING TO JUSTIFY GAMBLING. If gambling becomes an addiction for you, it’s no better than the glutton. And gluttony is the over indulgence on food, which is more than we need. So yeah, don’t gamble if you can’t control yourself. Don’t drink if you can’t control yourself. Don’t go to sports games or amusement parks if that is all your life becomes.

At the end of the day, what I’m trying to say here is that people need to stop judging so much about what other people do. One thing I always come across in evangelizing to people is that they think Christians are the most judgmental people ever. Which is true. Often time I hear my Christian brothers and sisters making faces at people and saying how bad those other people are. Instead we should sit down with them and show them love like Jesus did and simply tell them the relationship that God wants to have with them. It sounds contradictory, but it’s the truth. How can you love your wife, if you love money more than her so that you’d spend time gambling instead of that time with your wife. It’s the same with God.

So brothers and sisters, don’t read the sign at face value, but think about why and what God is trying to keep us from. And don’t judge other people because we were all caught in sin in various natures and degrees, but the most important thing is that we are all saved by grace alone, you didn’t earn it by being slightly better than another person.

I just wanted to learn something new today. So I thought I’d try to do some HDR stuff. I usually don’t like HDR things, but then I kind of wanted to see what my car would look like with this kind of sky. I don’t know how it turned out, but I guess it’s good. But today was an opportunity for a lot of things. Mostly to thank God.

As I was in class I was looking at my video, and I really liked how the shot composition came out. Sure, the videos are missing a lot of things, and isn’t the most detailed narrative, but I think I like it. And my professor said that the shots looked really good. Man, I’m just thankful that God gave me opportunities to practice my whole life to be where I am. The crazy thing is that I know that I can practice more and learn more. But ultimately, I want to learn these things to bring glory to God. To bring light to what God has in store instead of what the world is saying about Christianity. So I have a motivation to learn.

Then, another thing I was really stressing out about was on what to say at Grace’s church this Friday. I’m actually a guest speaker for the youth group and some other fellow AACF brothers and sisters are going there to do worship and also prayer! I’m so excited, but I had no idea what to speak on. Then God finally reminded me what I needed when God was seeking me. He brought me back to my testimony. I know that I don’t have to say anything, but allow the Spirit to work in my life and that is exactly what I need to share, the impact of God in my life.

Another crazy thing that happened was that I got a phone call, not just any phone call, but a phone call extending me an interview. I GOT MY FIRST JOB INTERVIEW! Oh my gosh, seriously thank you God for providing for me even when I don’t really deserve it. Seriously this is to teach at UCR as a TA… I have no teaching credentials and yet they found it worthy for me to teach. I don’t know… thank you God for whatever you are doing. Even if I don’t get it, the experience to go through an interview is blessing enough! Thank you God.

I seriously don’t think I deserve any of this. The ability to have new experiences and revelations everyday from God. Thank you. Truly you show so much grace.

You know those people that just touch you every time you have a conversation with them. I have a few brothers and sisters who really just have the words to say. So it was nice to just talk with people who really care about me and also who share the same mindset to serve God. I really thought that I knew what it meant to be busy, but I always look at others around me, and see how busy they are. Man I can push myself more. And I know I’m not alone, so it’s not really pushing myself, it’s pushing each other.

Then after class, it was such a blessing to have younger brothers help me out with a project that I had no idea about, and just kind of going along with it. I had an artistic brain fart for so long, and I think I finally found what I was looking at. Something that touched my heart deep. The idea that money can bring happiness. I know it’s cliche, but it’s inevitably something that will fail forever. So it’s an idea that didn’t exist until we started shooting, and I’m thankful for these brothers who helped me out even though it was so cold and so random.

But then we got to Inreach, and it was good to hang around with my brothers and sisters again. Just getting to know each other more and praying for each other and seeking each other out. I know we can rely on each other more and need to be more open. But I’m looking forward to it. I know it starts with me. I always think I can do it on my own, but then I realize that I can’t. The people around me have input that is important and I need to start listening to them and opening up to them. So this year isn’t just about serving the group, but it’s learning that there are people right next to me who I can pour out to, not only my burdens but also my happiness. I’m so glad I have these brothers and sisters, and I am going to continue to love them because God blessed me with them.

And even though we’re fat and splurged on some pazookis, I think that it was good to get away from everything. I just hope that we would all continue to grow together.

Other than school and ministry though, today was just an interesting day in self-reflection. I don’t really get that much time to do that, but recently I’ve just been thinking about how I really want to give up everything to God. I’ve been so worried about everything, that I forget to focus on God and what I can do for him.  I should stop thinking about what I can’t do, and the things I can do. The things I can do, I should be giving it 100% of my effort and then I know that God will give me the strength to do it. Even if I don’t think it’s successful, nothing about this life will matter after I die unless God is glorified. So I just need to remember to live and let live.

I need to start being honest, and go further than skin deep. It’s time to reach in, deep in and find the things that are truths.